Why You Keep Losing Friends (And How to Fix It)"

 If you're watching this video, you probably want to find friends, meet new people, or simply feel good and comfortable in social settings. I'll show you how to achieve this in 3 steps and give you some practical tips, but before we start, I want to draw your attention to a few important things:

1. You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with in your life. If you spend time with positive people who have dreams and aspirations, you will be such a person. If, on the other hand, you spend time with negative people who have no desire for change or development, you will adopt similar habits and patterns of behavior in your own life. In other words, the environment determines your destiny. This concept is fundamental and we will come back to it later.

2. No one is born knowing everything. Developing as people is part of the chance we get in this life we have. Therefore, follow the next steps at your own pace and don't get unnecessarily stressed.

3. Don't believe false things about yourself that limit you. You may call yourself an introvert because you have similar patterns of behavior with other people, but this is not your end point, but your starting position. I am sure that there are talents hidden in you in size and depth that you do not suspect. And I hope that with this and my other videos you will be inspired and get closer to your true self.

I myself have gone through some obstacles in the last few years, one of which was finding friends, and I, like you, perhaps considered myself an introvert and found it very difficult to get out of my shell and open up to the world. I have made many mistakes and have been in awkward situations, but now, a few years later, I am surrounded by good friends and have attracted the right people around me. I am not afraid to give a presentation to many people, to go to an event alone or where I don't know anyone, to talk to a random person. The unpredictability of each of these events makes me curious about what fate has in store for me. And yet I went through stress and self-pity to be here and now. And since I don't want this to happen to you, I will share where I went wrong and what I learned. And at the end of the video, I will also give some practical tips that will help you when meeting new people.

Give free rein to your courage. You need to prepare yourself mentally for change and for getting out of your comfort zone. Believe that all this makes sense and that it will make you a better and happier person. If you are gently surrounded by your current company of friends, you will never have the time and energy to meet new people. If you are never alone, you will never be forced to take a leap into the unknown, and coercion or necessity is one of the strongest motivators, as I have learned.

A few years ago, circumstances forced me to leave everything behind and start a new life in a new city, where I had started pursuing a master's degree. My courage gave me the strength to go to events alone, to talk to the people sitting next to me in lectures, to be more open and sociable. I hoped that all this made sense. And most of the time I didn't give in to the quiet voice that whispered, "You can try again next time." This is what I want to advise you too. Don't let old memories from your past, from who you are, interfere with the strength and freedom of your spirit in the present moment. If you feel that this step is difficult for you and you cannot simply find the strength for change, then remember that you determine your own pace. You can try something new once a month, for example, a course or an event. If it is still difficult for you, seek support from people who understand you, such as a good friend or your family.

When you find courage, you need to be sure that the path you are walking on is paved with authenticity. Authenticity means knowing yourself and being true to your values and principles, no matter what situation you are in. By knowing yourself, by being yourself, you will inevitably attract people who have the same values in life as you. Otherwise, you will find yourself with people you don't enjoy. And worse, you will try to please them. I have made this mistake myself. I wondered why I didn't like this person or that person, why I had nothing in common to talk about with a certain group of people, and this can easily turn into self-pity and self-blame, which is a fast track to depression. So look first into yourself. If you don't know where to start, then think: What do you admire? Maybe morality, honesty, or positivity? Live according to these values, hang out with people you enjoy, and don't compromise, because you too deserve to be happy. Remember, you are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with in your life.

When you find courage and get to know yourself, you are already on the home stretch. All that remains is to be clear about one fundamental rule in human relations, and that is the third and final step: Be empathetic. Empathy means being able to put yourself in the other person's shoes, to have a sense of how he or she feels at the moment, and even more important, to have a genuine interest in your interlocutor, so that while you are talking, he or she feels like the center of your universe. People love to talk about themselves and to be the center of attention, so ask questions, be interested, and remember that when you meet a new person, a whole world opens up before you and invites you to become a part of it. The importance of empathy is the main conclusion from the best-selling book on human relations of all time, "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. This book changed our understanding of human relationships, but even if you haven't read it, if you remember the main thing, you are already on the right track.

Finally, I will give you some practical tips that will help you find new friends and make a good impression on them:

1. Look people in the eye. Nothing makes a worse impression than a person who looks elsewhere while talking to you. This subconsciously suggests that he or she cannot be trusted.

2. Remember the names of the people you meet and use them. Our name is our most personal thing, and in this fast-paced world, nothing makes a bigger impression than addressing the person you are talking to by their personal name.

3. Smile more. Statistically, there is a greater chance that someone will start a conversation with you at an event or a party if you are smiling and radiating positivity. Even if you are nervous, still smile. This will have a psychological effect on you and you will have more energy and desire to meet new people. Moreover, it has been proven that psychologically, we perceive smiling people as more intelligent.

These were some tips that will help you find the right people around you and make a good impression on them. I hope they were helpful and I want to know what is the thing that is currently bothering you the most and not allowing you to live the life you want. If you want, write to me as a comment or by email, I promise to answer or make a whole video on the topic. Thank you and see you soon!